Francis Githinji asked:


Making friends is an art and, you will need to learn some of the things that it takes to get the art. The art of making friends unlike what many think is not complicated at all. You will need to look for vital tips that will actually guide you. To make good friends, we need to be guided and, the following are some of the secrets that will see you learn the art and make the friends that you want and deserve. First, before you say you deserve good friends, it is vital to look at what you are like. Your behavior and mannerisms are directly linked to the kind of people you draw in your life to be your friends. In other words, you will make friends who are just like you. The art of making good friends is about looking for good friends because you are worth good friends. There are no two ways about it and, you will see this to be true in your life. There are other factors that come to play while learning the art and they include the following.

The art of making friends will depend on the age you are at. Your gender will also shape the kind of friendships you get into. Above all, your personality is the key to make friends as we have mentioned earlier. If you are the kind of person who is introverted, the way you make friends will actually be different from the way others make friends. There are several things that will guide you on how exactly you can master the art of making friends in your life. After you have considered the kind of person you are, it is time to look at the areas in which you can improve. For example, if you realize that your traits cannot attract anybody, you can change and look for some virtue to incorporate in your life. This is a place where many fail and it has to do with changing. Many will pretend to be something they are not just to get into friendships that will later die. You must be true to yourself to look for real change if you want to make good friends.
The art of making friends will call to a realization that nobody is perfect. You will make good friends who will make mistakes. Mistakes help us to learn and move on. Therefore, when faced with problems, know that they are not unique to you. When you have this in mind, it is good for you to be friendly when you spot a potential friend. Many wait to meet friends by default. You have to take a deliberate step when looking for friends. However, it is good for you to take it easy not to force things. You cannot force yourself to be somebody’s friend and you will realize that it will take a mutual agreement before you take the relationship to a deeper level. The art is not complicated at all and there is one guide that will see you maintain the friendship in the manner you are supposed to. You should treat others the way you would want to be treated. When you keep this in mind, you will always make relationships you are proud of.

Kevin L. Powers asked:


After a six-year hiatus director Mike Mendez returns behind camera for the horror romp THE GRAVEDANCERS. Having broke every religious taboo with his previous film THE CONVENT, Mendez returns in full form with this entertaining and imaginative film about a group of friend who desecrate three graves in a cemetery and inadvertently wake the dead.

Now, going into this film you can’t concern yourself with the absurdity of the whole premise you just have to go with it. Three school friends get back together after one of them dies. Having not seen each other they all gather at a bar and get drunk while reminiscing over the good old days before heading to the cemetery for one last goodbye. Letting loose they decide to have a little fun by dancing on the graves and desecrating the ground which awakens angry spirits which latch onto each of them.

Upon learning from a group of paranormal investigators that they have until the next full moon to rid themselves of the spirits before the spirits are strong enough to kill them, the three search for a way to exorcise the spirits. What follows is a darkly comic misadventure of the three friends as they are teased by their spirits before the big finale in the paranormal investigators’ home.

The cast is at top form with Dominic Purcell (from the short lived television series JOHN DOE) heading the group that includes Clare Kramer (from television’s BUFFY, THE VAMPIRE SLAYER), Josie Maran, Marcus Thomas, Tcheky Karyo, and Megahn Perry.

The film borders on self parody but like Mendez’ previous film THE CONVENT he knows how to balance the laughs with the screams for an enjoyable ride.

Ray Shane asked:


A free friendship dating site is a blessing in disguise for many people who have not found any success with speed dating sites or romantic dating sites or other varieties of internet dating sites.

Free of Cost Friendship Website

The main advantage of hooking up with a free friendship dating site is that firstly, the registration process is free and you can create your account and search through the data base absolutely free of cost.

In a reputed friendship site where registration is 100% free (though you have to upgrade and become a paid member to send messages) you can create a peppy profile, interact with a huge member base and take a look at their profiles, indulge in blogging sessions, send emails and chats and instant messages etc. In short you will get to enjoy all the features of a paid online dating service or friendship site without having to pay anything!



Set Your Own Pace for Relaxed Friendship Dating

A free friendship dating site will allow you to proceed in the dating game at your own comfortable pace without hurrying you on. And these friendship websites are very easy to use and won’t leave you confused through intricacies that are difficult to comprehend.

All that you need to do to meet men online or meet ladies online and make friends online free is to sign up, create your profile, search through or browse through hundreds of member profiles, send friend requests to those you like or accept friend requests from members if you like their profile and you can simply start scrapping them or leave behind comments in their diaries or scrapbooks to carry on with the friendship. You can use smileys or graphics or instant messages as conversation starters.

And these friendship websites are pretty flexible with time. You don’t run the fear of getting unsubscribed after 3 months or 6 months due to non payment of fees. There is no membership deadline as such and most people remain loyal subscribers of a good and trusted friendship site for years and years, taking their own time to judge people or meet more new people. There is no attached rider like expiry of membership period and you can make as many new friends as you like for 4 years or 10 years.

Wider Scope and Larger Database to Choose Friends from

In a free friendship site, it is possible to meet people from all walks of life, from all ethnicities, from all religious or communal groups and you have the scope to explore your options from a larger database of members as maximum numbers of people prefer to join a free friendship site.

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship coach asked:


Making friends is a skill, just like playing the piano or riding a bike. Skills can be learned and behaviors can be changed. While it may require more effort for some people to be comfortable in groups, it can be learned, especially if the child is willing to put forth the effort and knows that she has your support.

Be sure to encourage a child’s positive efforts to get along with peers and to find a friend, even when it appears that such attempts are not meeting with success. Remind her of the fine qualities that she has that will add to the friendship when just the right person comes along.

Another reminder is that making just the right friend for her may take some time and not to give up. Help her to see what she has to offer as a friend. For example, you might say: “I really appreciate it when my friends call me and invite me places. It makes me feel welcome and accepted. Even on the times when I am not able to go, I still feel good to know they thought of me. That is why I treat them with kindness and respect, because that is how I want to be treated.”

In my workshops I find it helpful to make a list of what people look for in a friend. You may want to make such a list with your child. After brainstorming it is easy to include such things as:

• Trustworthy

• Kind and compassionate

• Willing to share happy and sad times

• Loyal, will watch my back

• Sense of humor

• Positive attitude, upbeat

• Similar interests

• Fun to be with

• Not be too possessive or needy

• Cooperative

• Enjoys being with me

If you look at the list, almost never does it include psychical attributes, they are all character traits and inner personal skills. If we don’t have those skills, we can work on obtaining them by practicing a little each day until it becomes automatic action. It is this attitude of openness and willingness to share that is communicated to those we would like to be our friends.

The irony is that people, young and old, tend to blame outward appearances for lack of friends, when it is the inward attitudes and character traits that are longed for in friendship. We are not searching for lovely nearly as much as loyalty in a companion and buddy.

When we realize that it is not our big ears, speech impediment or color of skin that stops others from befriending us, as much as it is how we treat others and feel about ourselves, we will have more to offer a friendship. As you encourage making a list of what the child is looking for in a friend, be sure to mention that appearances may be deceiving. She may very well know many in her class who are also looking for just the right person to hang around with.

Hopefully, your child will draw her own conclusions that she is a valuable person and has much to bring to a relationship. And likewise, there may very well be many people who meet the criteria of a friend that she has been overlooking.

It is more empowering for a child to list her own positive qualities that will make her a valuable friend than for you to do it for her. This is her work, but you are the support team. You cannot make your child happy, popular, talented or attractive to other children. If you think you can, you will be setting both of you up for disappointment and a great deal of frustration.

What you can do is offer her suggestions, assistance, opportunities and options. Hopefully, she will recognize the clues of social interaction and ‘click’ with a good group of friends who will support her in her school years and become life long buddies.

How you manage social situations affects the way your children view social interaction. If you have meaningful relationships that add pleasure to your life, they will see that and want to have the same thing.

I also do Confidence Coaching for young adults (8 to 18) Call me for more information.

© 2008 by Judy H. Wright, Parent Educator, Author and international speaker on family relations. Ph: 406.549.9813 You may reprint this article, but please keep the contact information and content intact.

For Free articles and to sign up for the e-zine The Artichoke-finding the heart of the story in the journey of life please go to www.ArtichokePress.com You will also find a full listing of books, workshops, and Free teleclasses held every Thursday on family relationship issues.

For a free eBook on non verbal and verbal communication go to

jANINE asked:


Autistic children on the whole have issues when it comes to making and keeping friends.

Sometimes they can find themselves as the targets for bullies, because of their lack of social understanding and on occasion’s odd behavior, language and unusual pre-occupations and tendencies.

Their lack of understanding and ability to respond in socially expected ways to nonverbal cues can lead to conflict or being ignored by others. Children with Asperger’s syndrome will sometimes be extremely literal and may find interpreting and responding to sarcasm or banter difficult….And may well not understand what has been said or done.

Children with mild autism, will often want to be social, but have trouble making friends. This can lead to later withdrawal and antisocial behavior, especially in adolescence.

Therefore, the sooner an autistic child learns how to make appropriate friendships the better. It can help reduce problems, like bullying and lead to better relationships with people who aren’t on the spectrum.

It is easy as a non-autistic person to forget how complex social skills are;

For example:

• How to enter into other children’s activity

• How to allow another child to enter into your own game or activity

• Knowing when someone needs help, and how to find help, also how to get help from others.

• Giving and receiving compliments at the right time.

• Understanding about positive criticism, when and how to give.

• Being able to accept and handle criticism from others

• Accepting the ideas and suggestions of others, and what to do with them

• Controlling negative situations and turning them into a positive

• Learning how to act appropriately at home and in public

• Understanding body language, and ****** expressions

• Understanding and using “nick names”, appropriate use of words, like swear words, or rude gestures and words.

• Taking part in conversation.

• Managing disagreement with compromise instead of aggression or emotional outbursts

• Accepting not everybody will agree with you, and recognizing peoples opinions can at time vary.

• Empathizing with others in both positive and negative situations

• How to leave an activity or situation without causing offense.

Non-autistic children will learn these social skills in an unconscious and intuitive way, by observing and interacting with everyone around them.

However with autism these skills are not normally learnt in such a way, and need to be learnt in a more definite manner.

For example:

“Autism Social Skills Stories”

Social stories are used as a tool in helping people with autism focus and learn social skills in a positive manner. Skills like learning to ask questions, or how to control anger, what are nick names and so on.

Using autism social skills stories can increase your child’s ability to make and maintain friendships-by giving your child clear social cues on how to get and keep a friend.

Plus how to act in all situations and activities, making your child more confident and ultimately helping them to make those friendships they need to fit into their environment.

We all need friends, a good friend can be like gold dust, and by using social skills stories your autistic child can maintain normal friendships.